E.G. (elainegrey) wrote,

Vacation time approaches (work, f&f, us)

Vacations make me sad. Christine and i had such different formative experiences. She had formal summer vacations: a week at the beach, same place, every summer. Fun outings for miniature golf, movies, etc.

My family might join Dad on his two weeks active duty if it was in the states. Heaven forbid we pay to do something. Otherwise outings were road trips to grandparents or to aunts and uncles, or quick trips to the lake. We did have family from Orlando -- long before the mouse moved in -- and my parents and siblings lived there after i went to college. I have actually been to Disney parks more times than i can count as my grandfather would buy season passes (and i'm unclear whether my Imagineer cousin had any part in getting discounted tickets). One of the last trips there, my siblings were begging to go home and do homework. My extended family does not know how to sit still and relax together until we had spouses who taught us (and i can't be sure about my brother learning).

So for Christine and i, actual vacation -- from the very first time we took a hotel room at the beach together -- often triggers her. It's hard for me to think of a vacation where Christine was relaxed and OK the whole time. Camping trips helped, i think, by not resonating with any triggers, and disappointing by a hotel not being up to snuff. When we were in California i was able to figure out some remarkable itinerary, and i think Christine relaxed into it because it was a trip for me and she was accompanying. It wasn't a vacation for her.

So, we're going to try a vacation at home in a few weeks. the initial planning triggered and was fraught. I hope we can make small steps to R&R together.

Before that, my sister's family is vacationing in the mountains. I'm going to spend more time with my parents that week. I've gotten out of the habit between work pressure and pandemic.

One of the projects at work -- the one i have been working on for over a year - -is about to be scuttled, i think. I'm not sure how i feel about it. We need to do some of the work someday, somehow. On the other hand, it is so large and ambitious.... Anyhow, with this lull, and summer in general, it's time for me to take a little time when everyone else is.
This is also posted at https://elainegrey.dreamwidth.org/818849.html .
Tags: f&f, us, work

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