E.G. (elainegrey) wrote,

And another day colored heavily by the absence of prednisone in my system, tears at lunch not for any good reason (well, because not communicating well in a meeting). Therapy after lunch was good with the message that while i was obviously fragile i was also thinking clearly.

From someone at meeting:

I gather that we will be discussing this, but I wanted to let you know that I have had two recent contacts about when Meeting might be held in person at Spring. We all know that it won't be any problem to be socially distanced as few as we are and as large as the Meetinghouse is.

Am I accurate that we will be discussing this?

My reply

yes, we will discuss what we each know to our own experience this coming Sunday in order that we may discern right action at Meeting for Business. I think it's important for us all to listen to the needs of all in meeting and hold space for opportunity for Light to lead us to ways of Worship that are right for this time. It's clear to me that in person meetings are not advisable for some in meeting until vaccines are available.

I hope this makes sense. Feel free to call me after 5:30 pm if you'd like to chat.

My desired response, "*We all know*?? *We all know*?? I sure don't know that." The place has one door and i don't think the windows open. Everything i've read about air circulation and the virus makes the thought of being inside a closed space with a bunch of other people highly unattractive as a voluntary activity.

I feel mixed feelings over my desire to stay safe. But between responsibilities -- only breadwinner for household, aging parents who need support (admittedly, sister L is doing all the heavy lifting right now) -- and the reminder of the reality of my asthma and the uncertainty we have as to long term repercussions, i feel the responsible thing is to minimize voluntary exposure. Death isn't the only thing to consider. And i do wonder what the long term impacts of an infection will be. People who have recovered have had only months to see what recovery is like.

In a similar vein, i have finally decided i can't -- HA! The local co-op has finally posted the offerings of the bulk section! I can do a curbside pickup with them. Huzzah.

I can't quite tell how i'm feeling right now. Meeting and others' desire to meet in person weighs on me.
This is also posted at https://elainegrey.dreamwidth.org/812242.html .
Tags: covid-19, depression, health, quaker notes

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