E.G. (elainegrey) wrote,

Friday morning i wrote:

I saw two fireflies last night! (At least two.) And then, this morning, i found a very small tick crawling around. I think this year i'm going to be more intentional about the clothes i am wearing outside and where i put them when i return in.

Spring seems very springing at the moment.

I had an idea this morning as i looked at someone's pronouns in their signature. I changed mine to say, "She can be reached at," followed by contact information. It seems a little more natural language. I have mixed feelings about the "list my pronouns" trend. I acknowledge that the pronouns are necessary as our language doesn't insist on a signifier for race or class in sentence structure. If i could order a solution, my inclination would be to lean to using gender neutral language more pervasively. I imagine gendered pronouns would linger in intimate settings. I wonder if they'd fade like the intimacy of the informal second person pronoun, "thee."

The two Democratic candidates for congressional midterms are Watts and Wong. "Watts wong in congress?" insists on being stuck in my head. I'm registered as an independent, so NC allows me to choose a primary in which to vote. There isn't a Republican primary, so this is the election of our Sheriff and Clerk of court.

--== ∞ ==--

Mom came by yesterday evening bearing six crystal water glasses, a photo album of a 1986 trip to southern California, and some random printed page of an old email from her sister saying "Thank Judith" and a pickle recipe. Thank heavens Dad called to let me know -- i was about to go on a long walk with Carrie. I reoriented so the end of my walk would be beside the road so she could see me if i hadn't made it home in time. Mom was reassured when i had to look up how old my birthday-girl niece is (9 years old). Dad is a little distressed that Mom had to ask about my brother's birthday on the 20th, a date shared with her brother's birthday.

I have a good track record of being a scatter brain, so i think no one will worry when i can't recall dates. We can worry when i don't know to look in Evernote (or subsequent reference sources).

But Mom's scattering is different from the woman we all knew. I realize my desire to mother her, comfort her, ease her way, and tears fall as the image i painted of a mothering spirit flashes in my mind. I did not get that mothering from her: i think i am mourning that i never ever will. I thought i knew that, but i guess it still hurts. And i guess i mourn how the gifts she did share are fading.

--== ∞ ==--

Yesterday's outside work was mainly a burn of brush etc. I started with a bare fire spot as well as some old dead wood. I brought greener and greener wood to the pile, but eventually it was too green to really burn easily despite the very hot coals. I still have a good bit of old wood around to help get some of the very green stuff burnt. Three sweetgums, one of which is quite large (easily 80' tall) await being cut down.


The local medical practice consortium does not know how to use their in-chart email. I think all they have done is hired a nurse to reply to everything that nothing can be done without a visit. I wish it had been more contextualized to my question instead of a stock answer. Either, "It might be something that's not serious, Dr C will need to see you, do keep your appointment" or "Id does sound like something that may take a specialist, but we require an examination before specialist referrals."

Tags: f&f, morning writing, perpetual calendar

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