||[Oct. 12th, 2017|09:02 am]
Somewhere between sauteed and seared green tomatoes are just delicious. As the season draws to a close, i feel the need to be thrifty with bug-beset tomato fruits. I've suspected the critters hide in chewed up fruit and so i've been dumping them in the woods. But the nibbled on tomatoes i've been cutting them up (generally, for the grape tomatoes, simply a half that is good and a half that's been nibbled) and cooking them in the cast iron pan. Sure, really really ripe tomatoes are divine, but these are pretty good.
The greens are just beginning to be big enough to care about and not be too fussy when thinning. And the second planting of yellow squash is putting forth tiny little yellow fruit. It's hard to decide whether to pick them or not. Some i've picked and they've still been a bit green, others seem like they could have grown more.
We also have had some lovely rain: that should help gardening all around. I've planted some more beets and carrots to see if i can get them going before the first frost. I've seedlings of lettuce and particular brassicas in the green house that i should get out in the garden.
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This morning i am reading sonia's writing about healing around the edges as part of getting back into the habit of following my self-help reading schedule. I put the items in the reading list over the past few years, but in Nov of last year i stopped using my to-do list software (emacs org file, for the curious). I am trying to get back into the list habit, but as i restart i find EVERYTHING is overdue. Anyhow, i will truncate this digression to just say, yay me, i'm getting a self care habit back.
So, at some point, i noted that there are two "traumas" i want to work through (1) the awful years at work when VP Z was in charge and was keeping the then New Director at his side, and (2) the effect of Christine's elephants.
I was working with my somatic experiencing therapist during the Z-hell to cope through it. Just thinking about that time brings tears and the need to go through a cycle of feeling and then distancing myself from the feelings. I'm impressed by how quickly i found that distress lingering. It's clear i may need to be somewhat intentional about resolving those feelings.
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The spiders have mostly learned to stay clear of paths, it seems. They're still about: almost every window has a creature with a body at least the size of a quarter spinning a classic spoked web. Up above the front sidewalk a couple of spiders create their large webs. I suppose i'm going through some sort of exposure therapy, slowly reducing my aversion to the creatures. Maybe. If i think about them i find myself stressed. Breathe in, out, in, out.
After skimming through some resources, i think what has happened is that the spring baby orb weavers are finally big enough to make the massive webs by late August, creating spider web season. The females are probably getting as much food as they can for reproduction, and then, with the first frost, they'll be out of here.
It helps a little to understand why they aren't around all year.