||[Dec. 29th, 2012|08:37 am]
Yesterday afternoon was lost in a spate of waiting. Starting at 3 pm when i arrived to find the previous patient waiting, there were other waits in line to find things that were to be ready long before needed another ten or fifteen minutes.
This morning i still bewail my sinus condition and the various resulting discomforts.
I received in the mail a Travelsmith dress bought on eBay as part of my attempt to get work dresses for under $20. This dress turns out to be far more curve accentuating than my usual choices and yet doesn't leave me feeling like i'm wearing a sausage casing. It's knee length, which is also shorter than i usually choose. It will suit Christine quite well if i can't find myself wearing it, but i will give it a try today as we go out for brunch and then visit The Conservatory of Flowers and the De Young in Golden Gate Park. I'd love to go to the Academy of Sciences as well, but the day may be too short for that.
The switch to dresses is a shift for me that i think is mainly being driven by comfort and annoyance with the challenge of finding pants and jeans that fit. I feel like i never get the length right even if i finally find something that works with my hips and waist. For years i wore skirts, but somehow the skirt doesn't seem as appealing as the simplicity of a dress: one outfit all together. This then leaves me considering my collection of exceedingly sensible shoes and wondering what to wear on my feet. My usual go-to walking shoes don't quite seem well paired with a dress.
On The Situation: I'm doing so much better than i was in November, do i have to keep working on this?
I saw the psychiatrist yesterday. I have received an additional SSRI prescription, and he wants to see me weekly for a few weeks. It felt terribly odd talking to him: i am feeling so much better than i was feeling in mid November. That sense of despair is gone, and i have tentative hope. The positive progress of working with the Apple-geek Therapist, and quite possibly his educating me on the sensitivities of timing with the version of Wellbutrin i had been taking, has made a big difference.
I had a sense of, "Why am i talking to this man?" which was not assisted by the digressions he encouraged, talking about his daughter at Temple and that i must be a genius since i was at U Penn and how smart was my spouse -- from where did she graduate? His value of status symbols annoyed me, and the long investigation of my brother's wife's family was probably delightfully appropriate for a social situation but.... Well, i am probably more prepared to disclose than the average person.
This gives me an excuse to stop seeing the Apple-geek Therapist (although as i wrote a check i did reflect on how efficient the Apple-geek Therapist is with his credit card adapters for his iPhone). At least for the few weeks i see this guy. I'm hoping to find another psychologist if i find myself really balking at the career counsellor's advice, but the Apple-geek therapist is there.
The real measure of progress will be working on the job change and coming to some clear decisions. That hasn't happened yet.