December 23rd, 2018


Sick, again

The cold i tried to work through Monday-Tuesday slapped me in the face on Friday (which i had taken off to observer our anniversary), and walloped me Saturday. I sat on the couch all Saturday dozing through "Walking Through History" episodes.

Today, i went with Christine to the cemetery in Durham where her parents and extended family are interred. I walked Carrie around a loop, sending a flock of killdeer into flight several times, and watched a red-bellied woodpecker in a tree for a bit. Christine cleaned the faces of the mausoleum vaults and arranged new artificial flowers. Carrie and i watched others make similar visits to grave sides.

Being sick i've been out of the loop with respect to mom to some extent. I believe she's improving, because her therapist noted an improvement from one day to the next when i was last there. They plan to send her home, not off to more rehab. I don't know if that's because they think that home care leads to better outcomes or if it's because home care is the most economical and comforatble care for long term.

I wish i knew what to expect in a year. For her to be able to assist others in getting her to a wheel chair and to a toilet?

I recall a neighbor who i could not understand, but whose sons seemed to interpret clearly. I can easily believe we may get to a point where the family has facility interpreting her nonverbal communications and garbled words. Her facial expressions are clear. Will she be able to ever clearly express desires? Right now effective pointing doesn't even happen: she points off into a middle distance over her left shoulder at nothing periodically. At one time i thought it was to change the blinds at the window, then i saw her doing the same thing in a different room without a window. When i was in the same room with the doctor she didn't know how to show her thumb on her right hand to him, despite using it capably.

I've not seen her for three days, an wonder how she will seem to me tomorrow.

I've offered to Dad that i will work from their house some days to be respite for him. They're going to get broadband, so that might have some positive trade-offs.